Dollman vs. Demonic Toys

Dir: Charles Band

1993

****

 At the end of 1992’s Domonic Toys, Baby Oopsy Daisy, Jack Attack, Mr. Static and Grizzly Teddy were repeatedly shot and the demon controlling them sent back to hell by the ghost of an unborn child, so logic would suggest that it would have been the last we would see of them. Similarly, after 1991’s Dollman, we wondered whether he would ever find the answer to the question “Does size really matter”. The end credits to 1992’s Bad Channels suggested the answer was yes, and that Brick Bardo (Tim Thomerson) had heard of a certain shrunken lady called Bunny he may want to make the acquaintance of. A Domonic Toys sequel seemed inevitable, given Full Moon Picture’s methods and the general way of the horror gene, but Dollman 2 seemed unlikely and a Bad Channels follow up even less so. Thankfully, this wasn’t the case (but poor old Grizzly Teddy wouldn’t be seen ever again). I loved Dollman, I think Bad Channels is an overlooked 80s masterpiece and I found Domonic Toys ridiculously charming. So a three-way, ménage à trois, mash up sequel was music to my low budget, b-movie horror/sci-fi loving ears.  I’m not sure why Grizzly Teddy was replaced by Zombietoid, a blonde GI Joe action figure with a sword as a weapon, but I’m certainly not disappointed that the shrunken lady Dollman set out to find wasn’t Bunny, but was in fact Nurse Ginger (Melissa Behr returning to the role) from Bad Channels. An explanation is offered and excepted. The film relies on flashbacks from the three previous films an awful lot, understandable, but with a 64 minute run time it does seem a bit cheap at times. It is essentially a showcase for the three previous films but I think it still does a lot with what it has. The story begins with Brick Bardo making his way to the little town of Pahoota to visit the famous 11 inch women featured in all the newspapers. He feels the urge to reassure her that she isn’t alone, if you catch my drift. He finds her bikini-clad, sunbathing on a kitchen worktop and saves her from a giant (normal sized) spider, in a scene straight out of The Incredible Shrinking Man. Meanwhile, Officer Judith Gray (Tracy Scoggins from Domonic Toys) keeps watch over the toy warehouse were her partner and lover was killed and she was harassed by killer toys. Her dreams tell her that history will repeat itself some way or another and she wants to be there to deal with it when it does. She doesn’t have to wait long, as somehow a drunken homeless man sneaks past Ray the security guard (played by cult favourite Phil Fondacaro), stumbles into the warehouse, jumps on a kids bike, falls off, hits his head and bleeds on the exact spot that causes the killer toys to be awoken. The toys then somehow convince Ray to help them summon their demon master. Realising she is perhaps in over her head, Officer Gray seeks the help of Brick and Nurse Ginger, which is a little sizeist of her to be fair. Surely big people who could squash the toys would have been more advantageous but then Brick does have that powerful gun of his. Brick and Nurse Ginger agree to help and start by shooting Ray between the eyes, unfortunately for the trio, a clumsy prostitute has wandered into the warehouse and has been killed – precisely on the spot where the demon is buried, which of course begins the resurrection proceedings. Of course it is well known demons can’t be fully resurrected until midnight, which gives the three heroes a bit of time to sort things out. Things get a bit weird when the demon possesses Baby Oopsy Daisey and tries to rape Nurse Ginger. Brick fights off the remaining toys and calls Baby Oopsy Daisey’s bluff, until Baby Oopsy Daisey explains he now somehow has a penis and threatens to kill Nurse Ginger with cervical dislocation, after impregnating her and eating the baby of course. Admitting he now has a penis was his first mistake, a kick in the balls later and the day is saved. Brick and Nurse Ginger then go back to the giant kitchen where she lives and have tiny sex. I’m not sure you could ask for more from a sequel, apart from it being a little bit longer and maybe asking for another one? Early 90s, low-budget horror/sci-fi, you just can’t beat it, the genre hadn’t been as good since the 50s and I wonder whether the introduction of CGI will ever see it be as great again?