The Dark Tower
Dir: Nikolaj Arcel
2017
**
Stephen King’s Dark Tower series began back in 1982 with the release of The Gunslinger. Since then there have been seven further novels – eight if you include The Little Sisters of Eluria. It’s the Stephen King series that the hard core Stephen King fans can nerd out over, as it incorporates many characters from his other works. Suffice to say, fans have been anticipating a big screen adaption for some time, although I don’t think anyone thought it would be easy. I do wonder whether a television series would have been a better option but if I saw a hard core follower then I would want a faithful adaption of each and every novel to be released in order – it’s not as if there aren’t enough fans of both The Dark Tower and of King’s work in general. The stories have a lot going for them, each one is totally different to the next and they incorporate a wide range of genres. Granted it wouldn’t be an easy series to adapt but at the same time the possibilities were endless. J. J. Abrams and his Lost co-writers Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof were attached in 2007, around the time people were still watching Lost and hadn’t ‘lost’ interest. They worked on it for two years before agreeing that after a lengthy series the last thing they wanted to do was enter into a project that would have taken decades to complete. Linedelof rather maturely stated that as the biggest Dark Tower fan on the planet he was probably the last person who should adapt it. Ron Howard was then approached when it was decided that instead of either an adaption of each novel or a trilogy, they would instead produce a TV series with motion picture intervals. I have no idea how or if that would have worked but after five year Howard left the project when Sony wouldn’t green-light his ideas. Then Nikolaj Arcel joined the project. No disrespect to Arcel, his direction is good and he can be creative on low-budgets as seen in 2007’s Island of Lost Souls, but he isn’t quite in the same league as Abrams or Howard. Respect due, the film is visually strong, it’s really the story that lets it down of which Arcel is also responsible for. The novels have a wealth of ideas, even if you were to combine several books into one film you’d have plenty to work with, so why Arcel and the other screenwriters decided to set the story after the last novel is puzzling to say the least. The story is uneventful, a bit dull to be honest, with very little that stands out. I watched it last night and I’m already beginning to forget it. Idris Elba is cool but he is given absolutely nothing to work with. Matthew ‘Alrighty’ McConaughey was also great in his part and established the character fairly early on, but also suffers from a terrible script – in short, the performances are fine but the character development is dire. The best thing about the Dark Tower series is that it is a real mix of genres and ideas but none of that can really be seen in the film. It is about as formulaic as you can get from a fantasy/sci-fi film and I think it would have been more sensible to have played to a more grown up audience, indeed, the people who read and love the books. I’m not sure why that is such a strange concept for movie studios to understand. The dark Tower novels are all best sellers, they have a global collective of fans – give them what they want and others will follow. Making a film based on an established series that has been going on now for nearly forty years purely for people who know nothing of it, is utterly ridiculous and, in all honesty, deserves to fail. I did wonder how they would tie-in all the other Stephen King characters from his connected universe, more were planned but copyright issues proved to be problematic. Ridiculous really but that’s how the world works. There were a few Stephen King references; the Rita Hayworth poster from The Shawshank Redemption and the Plymouth Fury (Christine) in our protagonist’s bedroom, and for course the fact that said protagonist is said to have ‘The Shine’ – as in The Shining. There is a scene where a St Bernard Dog walks past and a pair of twins can be seen early on in the film, these could be references to Cujo and girls from the Shining but that could be looking into it a little too much. A picture of the Overlook Hotel can clearly be seen though, so The Shining is definitely covered. Salem’s Lot is referenced by a background sign that reads ‘Barlow and Straker’s’ – two characters from the novel – but you’d be lucky to spot this first time. The other two ‘Easter eggs’ that are really forced are the smiley face from Mr. Mercedes and a porthole that is numbered 1408. My favorite was probably the copy of Misery’s Child that can be seen in our protagonists room. It’s neat because it doesn’t reference the film directly, it is a work of fiction that is seen in King’s other work of fiction. However, the biggest reference is the discovery of the ruins of an old fairground with a big rusty sign clearly spelling out ‘Pennywise’. It is incredibly forced and the camera lingers on it for more than is needed. It is probably the film’s highlight. It is ridiculous that an ‘Easter egg’ would be the best thing in a film, but for all the references in The Dark Tower, it’s still not quite what the fans wanted. The story could be overlooked as it feels more like a puzzle than a film. By the end I was hoping that the Goblin Truck from ‘Trucks’/Maximum Overdrive would show up and run someone over before The Langoliers would come and eat everything. Unfortunately the conclusion was far less interesting and memorable than that but hopefully my idea will be considered when the eventual re-adaptation happens in around twenty years time.